Lesson 1: The World of Marriage

Our hope is that our weekly webtoon can spark discussion and connection between you and your partner. Here are additional materials to guide your conversation. Please feel free to pick what works for you!

VIDEO

Discussion Questions

Basic

1. How does it feel to know that the journey of marriage has predictable stages?
2. What parts of the journey are you most curious to learn more about?

Advanced (For MST Alumni)

1. Pop Quiz: Do you remember the Key Dynamic of each stage?
2. Where is your relationship in the journey of marriage? Why would you say so?
3. Each Gate represents a challenge you need to master in order to “level up.” What Gate are the two of you currently trying to pass through?

Bonus: A Simple Habit of Love

We bond with each other when we are able to connect heart to heart through our feelings. Sometimes, in the hectic day-to-day, it’s easy for interactions between partners to focus on tasks and logistics, but that does not draw us closer to each other emotionally. One simple habit to slow us down and connect to our feelings together is the ancient practice of the Prayer of Examen. This is a Christian practice developed by St. Ignatius, but it can be easily adapted regardless of your own spiritual beliefs. Ask each other:

1. What was the moment this week for which you felt the most grateful?
2. What was the moment this week for which you felt the least grateful?
3. For Christians: Talk to God together about these moments. What is God saying to you through these experiences?

spiritual connection

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (James 1:2-4, NIV)

Q & A

What questions do you have about relationships? If there is interest, Esther and Joy are open to making short Q & A videos to address questions that come up. Please contact us with your questions, and we will do our best to answer them, for the benefit of our community.

Gratitude

As we launch our webtoon, we owe a debt of gratitude to the many, many teachers, colleagues, friends, family, and fellow travelers who have helped us along the way. We want to express our appreciation and thanks to Drs. Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson, who originated the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy that our World of Marriage is based upon. Esther graduated from the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy under Ellyn Bader at The Couples Institute, and we greatly appreciate Ellyn’s expertise and skills in modeling what leadership looks like as a couples therapist.

The Couples Institute has a great training program for therapists, as well as many resources for couples, including Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson’s book, Tell Me No Lies. We invite you to check them out!

Attending Ellyn Bader’s presentation at the Evolution of Psychotherapy Conference, 2023